Jewelry-wearers, excuse me for a moment while I talk past you. You know what you like, and what it’s worth to you. If you want this stuff, you’ll buy it. This message is for your partners, spouses, and significant others.
PSASOOJWs, you’re plenty smart about a lot of things. You have insurance; you’ve diversified your wealth; you pack spare BVDs in your carry-on in case the airline loses your checked bag. You’re protected against catastrophic outcomes in all these areas in more because you’ve made a Plan B. You know Plan B doesn’t have to be a great plan. You don’t have to pour a lot of money, or thought, or time into it. It just has to provide some modest protection when the turds are in the turbine.
But here’s the one potential scheißeschauspiel you aren’t hedged against: Valentine’s Day. Why not?
The jewelry-wearer in your life told you (or agreed when you suggested) “let’s not do Valentine’s Day this year.” And you just took that proposition at face value. No Valentine’s Day! You wanted it to be true. So you didn’t push back, you didn’t double-check, didn’t examine that agreement to see how reluctant it might have been. Maybe you were afraid your beloved’s mind would change.
But PSASOOJW, now is when you should be afraid. Because now if your favorite jewelry-wearer decides Valentine’s Day is too important to utterly ignore, that decision will be made unilaterally. And when the day arrves, you’ll get a nice, thoughtful, heartwarming gift. And you will have gotten your wonderful, considerate jewelry-wearer… nothin’.
“I thought we said we weren’t doing gifts!” you’ll say. And the jewelry-wearer you love will be like: “I know. We did.” And your position will be sound. Yet shitty.
Hedge against this scenario. You don’t have to go all out, just put $10-36 into it, in the form of picking up this jewelry.
Then, instead of saying “I thought the deal was no presents, so I didn’t get you a present”, you can say “I thought we said no presents, so I didn’t get you much.”
The difference will be appreciable. It’ll be like a fresh, clean pair of undies on your relationship after a mix-up with your relationship’s bags.
