Ignoring Is Bliss
It is a truth universally acknowledged that there are two good reasons to buy headphones so large they effectively double the size of your cranium.
First: To maximize one’s auditory experience. Bigger speakers just sound better – that’s (actually) science.
Second: To communicate, in unequivocal terms, “Don’t talk to me, I’m wearing headphones, what the hell is wrong with you?”
So for fifty bucks these big-ass headphones with active noise cancellation should satisfy the most miserly of both audiophiles and introverts. Whether enjoying Scandanavia’s sludgiest metal with the Bass Enhancer mode or the blissful silence of one’s cowed coworker, these A-Audios provide it all (except, maybe, going all the way over one’s ears, according to some Amazon reviews).
Not convinced these headphones will effectively communicate your desire for solitude to the loudmouthed midwestern businessman seated next to you on the plane? Look at these things! They look like doors that requires a retina scan for entrance. They’re Nakatomi Plaza vaults for your ears. Nobody is going to see you wearing these and think “Gee, maybe that person would like to hear my opinion of Westworld.” And even if they do, the active noise cancelling will (mostly) drown them out.
They even come in two levels of garishness: Black for the refined recluse or Silver for the more overt. Both come with the same large-stamped “A” (for “Antisocial”) on each side to ensure even the most oblivious chatter gets your drift.
Maybe someday social norms will accept that anyone wearing anything on or in their ears should be left alone, but until that day comes do yourself a favor and buy these Headphones of Solitude.
Why are you still here? Can’t you tell we’re done talking?
Seriously, WTF?
