Life often rewards those who plan ahead and who act preemptively. You know, the people who buy their pantry staples before they run out. Or those who, at the end of February 2020, looked at the news and thought, Things are looking a little weird. Maybe I’ll stock up on toilet paper.
Given this fact, it makes sense that Poo-Pourri, the most effective eradicator of shit stink, suggests you to give the bowl a spritz before you squat. After all, it’s a whole lot easier to contain the rancid odor of digestion than it is to cover it up once it’s released.
Now, for many, a spritz of Poo-Pourri before you go and a flush after is enough to erase all evidence that you just made a big mud pie in that bathroom. But let’s be honest, for some of us, the process of dropping a deuce involves thrice the senses; it’s not just a matter of sight or smell, but also sound.
Which is why we suggest getting yourself a music player for the bathroom and putting together a playlist to drown out the various toots and grunts of your exertion. And what should put on that playlist, you ask? Well, that’s where it gets tricky. You need some songs that’ll cover up what’s going on without distracting you from the task at hand. We’re talking some good defecation-related tracks. For example:
- “Total Eclipse of the Shart”
- “Poo Are You”
- “I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do Shat)”
- “Jack & Diarrhea”
- “Icky Dump”
- “Poop John B”
- “Crapper’s Delight”
- “Groove is in the Fart”
- “Surfin’ Turd”
- “Band on the Runs”
Are we embarrassed by these terrible puns? On the one hand, yes. But on the other, the product is called “Poo-Pourri.” What are we supposed to do here?
Anyway, get some for yourself and keep the stink away with a quick spray!
